And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, to be with you for ever. This is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know the Spirit, because the Spirit abides with you, and the Spirit will be in you.

John 14:16-17

We had a nice walk, but it was tiring.

I go into our bedroom closet, at the back, where we keep a brown paper bag from CVS. I open it and take out the one of the small white cardboard boxes and stop by my wife’s desk on my way to the kitchen. She’s between online meetings. 

“Twelve left, after this one,” I say. 

“All individual?” 

“Yep. Twelve left.” She thanks me and I head to the kitchen. 

And I will ask the Father…

I go back to the kitchen table and pop the box open, setting the instructions to one side—I already used this type yesterday, but on our walk this morning I was feeling dead tired and even a little achey. Mireille said I should test again, and I said she was right. I’d gotten a call from someone I’d been in close contact with that they’d tested positive.

Another day, another test

I open the foil package and I set it on the table. I open the swab and leave it in the plastic sheath, recalling: fifteen seconds, swab both nostrils at least five times, then put the swab in the solution and twist it round five times. Squeeze the solution bottle as you take the swab out, wringing as much liquid from it as you can, then attach the dropper to the solution bottle and wait fifteen minutes. 

There’s a “C” and a “T” on the test strip. If you get a pink bar at the C, you’ve done it all correctly. If you only get a pink bar at the C, it’s a negative test. Good for you! Get on with your life! But if you only get a pink bar at the T, then you botched it. Go immediately to the closet and get another kit. Now there’s only eleven left, and you’re left wondering how it was that we all got pressed into medical testing. They used to pay people to do this. 

Remember at the beginning when there were only a few hundred tests in the entire city of New York for 8.8 million people? Now we’ve got them stashed in closets across the USA, ready to be deployed at a moments notice. 

I take out the swab and start swabbing. 

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate…

A prayer

Hey God, I’m sure you’re busy, but I have a lot to get done over the next couple weeks. I could really use a negative test result today. It would be great to be able to do everything everyone is expecting me to do. 

I put the swab in the solution and start twisting and swirling it around. How may different versions of these tests have I learned to use in the last couple years? I remember when we couldn’t even imagine testing at home. “Not reliable,” they were saying. 

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, to be with you forever.

I know I don’t get to choose this result and I know you’ll be with me through whatever it is, but I really it to be negative. 

The new normal

I squeeze the sides of the solution bottle as I slide the swab out. I throw the rest of the kit in the waste bin, and sit down to write this blog post for the week. I know I’ve been a little hit or miss lately, and I really wanted to get something posted. Maybe I’ll write about the Eagle Scout Ceremony I attended where I gave the invocation for Troop One. 

I set a fifteen minute time and throw myself into writing—the writing I’m doing right now. But the scouts will have to marinate for another week, because apparently I’m just needing to share the experience of this Covid test. 

And why? Well, I know a lot of others are doing the same thing these days, and I always want to offer something relevant, in sermons or in blog posts or whatever I do, for where people are at right now. Also, it’s a chance to show one of the kinds of prayers I use, prayers for patience and calm on the journey. I rarely pray for a specific outcome, but instead I just ask God to walk with me at certain times. 

Times? 

Timer!

The timer is ringing. 

This is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him.

God will be with me, whatever happens. God always has been. I breathe. 

I hold the test strip up to the light. 

You know the Spirit, because the Spirit abides with you, and the Spirit will be in you.